Fantastic Four Review

I just wasted an hour and a half of my life and I can’t get it back… This movie literally gave me brain cancer. 

fantastic-four-bannerThe Fantastic Four movie was supposed to make The Fantastic Four relevant again because we all know how bad the previous two films were. This new Fantastic Four makes the previous two look great in comparison. I don’t think there is a single good thing I can say about the film other then the fact that it ended and I was able to walk out of it in one piece.

The main problem with this film is the cast in my opinion. I didn’t like anyone in this movie. I don’t buy Miles Tellar as Mister Fantastic, and I definitely didn’t buy Michael B. Jordan as The Human Torch. It’s not because he’s black it’s because he portrayed The Human Torch badly. He tried way too hard to be funny, and likable when he wasn’t. His entire character felt forced, but the same can be said about everyone else.

The Thing looked like an abomination on steroids, and I really didn’t like Kate Mara as Susan Storm. It’s not because I think she’s a bad actress because she’s not. I just don’t think anyone had much to work with here and it shows. Usually when a movie has a bad story the action sequences make up for it. That’s also not the case here. Most of the “action” that we saw in The Fantastic Four was of The Thing throwing tanks around like a quarterback throws a football.

fantastic-four-2015-images-dimensionThe only real scene where we saw everyone fighting was against Doctor Doom at the very end of the movie and it was a horrible fight. What the hell happened to Doom? Why can’t anyone get his character right? He looked more like Colossus from X-men than the Doctor Doom that we all know and love from the Marvel Universe. He was terrible and I hope we never see Toby Kebbell play Doom again because he was terrible.

Every time I thought something exciting was going to happen it didn’t. It was just one random scene to the next without any real impact. We had no real reason to care about anyone in the film or the situation that they got themselves into. It’s not like the film makes sense anyway. This is a far cry from what The Fantastic Four should be. I think I speak for everyone when I say I hope Fox just lets The Fantastic Four go back to Marvel/Disney.

The Fantastic Four is anything but fantastic. It’s a horrible attempt, again, to breath some life into dull superheroes. I would rather watch the old films before I ever attempt to watch this crap again. Do yourself a favor and watch some porn because in the end you’ll probably enjoy it a lot more than The Fantastic Four.

The Verdict:

3/10

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Author: Drakulus

I'm a hardcore gamer that enjoys every type of genre there is. I'm also a father of four kids, two girls and two boys, and love to write about whatever pops into my head.

17 thoughts on “Fantastic Four Review”

      1. I’m not a fan of the X-men movies. They’re all Wolverine flicks to me. Deadpool looks interesting, but I’m not sure if I want to see it just yet.

      2. I love Wolverine as much as the next guy, but I would love to see Cyclops, Storm, Jubilee, Rogue, Gambit, and Beast get big roles too. That’s not too much to ask for you know… it is called an X-men movie, but the only X-men that ever gets screen time is Wolverine.

  1. I will take your advise and watch some porn instead… or just read your sexy Skyrim mods page again 😉

    Not surprised that this ended up being a train wreck. A lot of the creative choices they went for made no sense, such as Dr Doom’s design.

    Like you say, hopefully Marvel gets the rights back. This should have been a fun superhero team movie like Guardians of the Galaxy not some dark science caper.

    1. It’s earned these beatings that it’s taking from everyone :]. This is the worst comic book movie I’ve ever seen. I would rather watch George Clooney try and play Batman again…

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